


Old, Familiar Sting

by Megalodont



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Child Neglect, Delusions, Distrust, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Episode: s03e20 Sozin's Comet part 3 Into the Inferno, Episode: s03e21 Sozin's Comet Part 4 Avatar Aang, F/F, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Inspired by Music, Lesbian Character, Narcissism, POV Original Character, Perfectionism, References To Later Stuff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-06
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2020-02-27 20:13:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18746275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megalodont/pseuds/Megalodont
Summary: I will let you down, I will make you hurtORAzula drives everyone away to avoid betrayal, but there's someone who just won't go.





	Old, Familiar Sting

**Author's Note:**

> Ooof, OK. So, this was inspired by several things - The Sozin's Comet Episodes, a playlist for Azula and a few YouTube videos I watched delving deeper into Azula's character. Also the song _Awful Sound_ **(** _Oh Eurydice_ **)** by  **Arcade Fire**.  
> Secyla is an original character and while this does take place during Into The Inferno, there will be an alternate ending. Warning that there will be eventual smut (not this chapter, though).

_**"If I let myself go, I'm the only one to blame!"** _

_**T**_ he pit sent a shooting pain up her jaw. More than that, though, it was a stinging reminder that she should have never trusted these insolent little traitors to give her food of any kind. Azula spat out the pit and held her hand out to the servant.

"What am I holding _ **?**_ " She asked stiffly, her eyes narrowed at the girl with a deep offence. 

"A cherry pit, princess." The girl responded slowly. Azula was pleased by the fear in her eyes, even if she knew what was to be done with all of them. 

"Correct. And what day is this _ **?**_ " 

"It is the day of your coronation." The response was low, quiet, hesitant even. 

"Yes, it is. So, please. Tell me why, on the most important day of my life, you've decided to leave a pit in my cherry _ **?**_ " Azula asked, flinging the pit at the girl to emphasize her point.

"It wasn't a decision; it was just a small mistake." The servant pleaded though it would inevitably be fruitless.

"Small _ **?**_ Do you realize what could've happened if I hadn't sensed the pit in time _ **?**_ " The question hung on the air for a moment, before the servant finally seemed to pluck up the nerve to answer Azula.

"I suppose you could've ... choked _ **?**_ "

"Yes, then you will understand the severity of your crime." The princess responded, staring the servant girl down with a face she liked to think was reminiscent of her father. She'd tried to emulate his expressions and strength since she was a child. And she never disappointed him. Azula never failed, only she employed psychological warfare and complex tactics that would make her target foolishly believe they had defeated her, if only for a second, only to be quickly defeated by the princess taking advantage of the distraction. 

"I understand, Princess. Please, forgive me." And just like that, the bait was set.

"Oh very well, since it is a special day, I will show mercy." Azula began, sighing slightly. "You are banished. Leave this palace immediately." The servant did not argue, instead bowed quietly and exited the room.

"What are you all looking at _ **?**_ I have two feet that need scrubbing. And make sure you get in between the toes. I won't have my first day as Fire Lord marred by poor foot hygiene."

 

 Something was wrong with Azula. The redhead had not seen her friend all morning, had not heard from her and the servants all whispered about her in secret, chatting about Azula banishing a servant girl and behaving more high strung than usual. 

Secyla had seen Azula on bad days before. Normally, the princess would have called upon her friends to bask in the glory of her coronation with her, but since Mai and Ty Lee's betrayal, Azula had not asked to see Secyla. And that made the redhead very, very nervous. Azula being in a mood like this could spell trouble for the young woman. The princess' capacity for cruelty knew no bounds. And Secyla didn't even need to cross her, all Azula had to do was think Secyla was  _planning_ to cross her or was allied with Mai and Ty Lee. The longer Azula remained silent, the more anxious Secyla became. 

Secyla watched the Dai Li shuffle out nervously. Her position became more and more precarious by the minute. Her heart pounded - would Azula push her away?

Secyla didn't like to think so. Not after all they had been through, not if Azula knew how much Secyla loved her. And Secyla did love her - wholly, unrepentantly,  _unconditionally._ Surely, Azula knew that. She must. The future Fire Lord had tested the lengths of Secyla's devotions time and time again. She knew Secyla would die for her. 

Li and Lo scurried out of the palace now.

"What's happened _ **?**_ Is Azula well _ **?**_ " Secyla asked, taking up step next to the older women.

"That girl is losing her mind. " One said in response.

"Do yourself a favour - if Azula asks to see you, leave. Leave the whole kingdom. Change your name."

"It can't be all that bad." Secyla regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. She knew Azula, she  _ **knew**  _it could be all that bad, and worse.

"She's banishing everyone - you might as well leave now, you're veritably the only one left _ **!**_ " The redhead halted as the old ladies continued tottering on without her. 

OK, it was  **worse**. 

 

Azula stood in front of the mirror, staring down her reflection heavily. It couldn't be that hard to fix one's hair - she'd seen Mai and Ty Lee do it several times beforehand. She took a ribbon and began leisurely winding around her hair. Focused, her tongue hung from her mouth as she willed her hair to behave, as everything in her life should. 

Her hair, however, had other ideas, catching her hand as she tied her hair into a top knot. The princess growled in frustration, tugged at the tangled mess a few times. It was only moments before she grabbed a pair of scissors from the table next to her, ready to cut her hair.

"All right hair, it's time to face your doom." She growled. She grabbed the bangs hanging in front of her face, lifting them in the air and cutting them. the loose strands of hair fell at her feet. Azula grinned in satisfaction, deeming this yet another victory for herself. 

"What a shame, you always had such beautiful hair." She recognized the voice and hated it from the first syllable. 

"What are you doing here _ **?**_ " Azula demanded, her jaw tight. Her mother was not there, some part of her knew this. But she did not care.

"I didn't want to miss my own daughter's coronation," Ursa answered, her voice suggesting a smile but her face not bearing one.

"Don't pretend to act proud. I know what you really think of me. You think I'm a monster."

"I think you're confused. All your life you used fear to control people, like your friends Mai, and Ty Lee and Secyla." Azula rounded to face her mother, anger written in every pore of her face.

" Well, what choice do I have _ **?!**_ Trust is for fools. Fear is the only reliable way. Even you fear me." There was a hint of pride in the statement and it betrayed Ozai's influence over her. Betrayed her fear of him.

Even if she worked her hardest to please her father, done unspeakable things in his name, Azula feared him and feared to lose his favour.

She feared becoming like Zuko and Zuko was everything their weak-willed mother loved. Everything Azula herself hated. 

"No. I love you, Azula. I do." The words stung Azula's ears and filled her with anger. Ursa had never loved her, no one had ever loved her, not truly. Stray tears escaped her eyes as her fist closed around the hairbrush. 

She had not heard the mirror smash, only the sigh of disappointment from her mother, who was not even here. She had never been.

The knock at the door pulled the princess from inside of her own head. She had not considered that anyone else was still in the palace - who would still be in the palace ** _?_**

"Azula _ **?**_ Azula, it's . . . It's Secyla. May I come in _ **?**_ " The princess debated hotly with herself.

After a moment, she wiped the treacherous tears from her face.

"Enter." Secyla's visage in the mirror was cracked, but Azula could still make out the worried look on her face. "Are you here to tell me I shouldn't be Fire Lord too?"

"Never." The redhead assured her. "Is it true you've banished most of the court?"

"If you mean those liars and traitors, then yes, I have." She saw Secyla sink down, kneeling behind her. After a moment, her sobs were auditory and filled the room uncomfortably.

"Please, Azula - lock me away. torture me, _kill me_ , but please, please don't ask me to leave you! I could never,  _I love you **!**_ " The princess gritted her teeth.

"Stop crying _ **!**_ " She demanded, causing the redhead's breath to catch in her throat.

"Yes, Azula." Secyla rose to her feet, wiping her red eyes gently.

"You're acting like a child. Pull yourself together. I won't make you leave."

"You - You won't."

"No. But I will need you to do one thing."


End file.
